New Dreams

After the birth of our last child, I asked God to give me new dreams.  For so many years (all my life really) my big dream was to marry and have children.  I faced many uncertainties and challenges through my first 40 years, and was never very confident that my big dream would become reality.

Now, I am a married woman with 3 children who call me Mama, but I often feel empty inside.  Life is busy and each day is full, but when I stop and listen, there is a sadness within me.  For so many years I waited for God to answer my prayers and fulfill my dreams.  Now that the lifelong dream has been realized, what do I hope for?  Are the significant events of my life over?

Perhaps this is what mid-life is about.

So I asked God repeatedly to give me new dreams.  I desperately needed to know that there were meaningful and significant events still in my future.  In the meantime, I kept doing my daily business:  taking kids to school, cooking for my family, grocery shopping, helping kids with homework, working out, wasting time on Pinterest, and keeping up our social calendar.

Somewhere in the midst of all this, I stumbled upon the idea of family travel.  Since I traveled extensively as a single adult, it makes sense that I want to recapture a sense of adventure in my life.  I began obsessively scouring the internet to learn more about families who do full-time travel together.  The idea of traveling long-term with my family both challenges and energizes me.

I think this is a new dream that I asked God for.  Even though I now have a more-than-full-time job teaching 4th grade, the desire to travel and educate my children on the road has continued to grow in me.  I almost feel like this is what I'm meant to do.  It feels like a calling, like God designed our family for this.

I do get distracted, and wonder if this new dream will ever happen.  It is scary to pursue a dream that is outside of the traditional box that our culture and society draw around us.  I know that it will not make sense to others.

But I really want to keep dreaming.  Why does my dream have to be so big and different from everyone else's?  Will I trust God with this dream of full-time family travel? 

I think God knows me even better than I know myself.  I hope I will step forward and pursue this dream and that it will draw me closer to Him.  I think God has answered my prayers for a new dream.  It's up to me to follow it.  There are great things still ahead.


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