Turning 40
The big 4-0. Everyone makes a big deal about it. I guess it is sort of a big deal. I get that it's roughly halfway through my life (Lord willing that I live an average lifespan), and that I really can't refer to myself as a young adult anymore. Lots of people asked me how I feel about turning 40, and I honestly couldn't really think of anything profound to share.
I definitely don't feel like I am over the hill. My life is not exactly where I thought I'd be when I turned 40. I think mostly because I got married a little later and had my babies in my mid-to-late thirties (who'd have thought that I'd be nursing a 6 month old on my 40th birthday?) that I still feel young and even somewhat inexperienced. 40 just doesn't seem as old as I'd once thought it was. It also helps that I have great friends who turn 40 with me!
Way ahead of time, I told my husband that what I really wanted for my 40th birthday was time all by myself. That may seem kind of wierd to people, because usually people don't want to be alone on their birthday. But with my lifestyle right now I never get time to myself, and it is the one thing I crave. I am naturally a contemplative person, and more introverted as well. Staying home full-time with 3 young children leaves little room for solitude, meditation, journaling...the things I have relied on in the past upon for soul care.
Thankfully my actual birthday landed on a Saturday. My wonderful husband gave me the gift of time off and time alone. He took care of the kids for 6 hours while I did my own thing. I got a pedicure and ate a quick lunch, then headed out to the park for the rest of the afternoon. The weather was perfect, and I found a great spot on a little hill to lay out my mat & relax. Even though I brought a couple of books and my journal, I truly had no agenda. I read. I closed my eyes when I felt like it. I just stared out into space, totally alone with my own thoughts. I journaled. Most of all, I didn't have to do anything for anyone else! (this sounds so selfish, doesn't it?) It was a wonderful birthday gift. It was so refreshing and re-energizing. Mostly I was able to reflect on where God has brought me to at this point and how I am so grateful and thankful for His grace & love.
Good thing, because the very next day, I ran a half-marathon! This was a goal I'd set for myself awhile back. I had planned to do this race last year in May, but ended up becoming pregnant with our third child, so I secretly hoped I could do it this year instead. Being 6 months post-partum was enough time to train for it, and my husband is crazy enough to encourage me to do it (& run with me!). It was not a brilliant finish on my part, but I still feel so lucky that I can run, and it was good motivation to keep working out and get back into shape again. And extra blessing was getting to train with my good friend & neighbor, as well as with my dad & husband.
Finally, the last thing I did to commemorate completing my fourth decade of life, was to change my hairstyle back to one I've had for almost half of those years. My good friend and hairdresser gave me a perm (I think it'd been awhile since she's been asked to do one, but it turned out great!) It's been 10 years since I've had curly hair, and I missed it! Many people in my life now had never known me with curly hair, so I think it might have been an adjustment. But people have been mostly positive and I love it. My kids were both suprised. My son said, on the first night when I got my perm, "Mama, I love you. Even with curly hair." And my daughter, when she woke up and saw me the next morning says, "Oh! Your hair's still curly!" She also says that when she gets big she will have curly hair like me : ). She's so sweet. I hope I can emulate a few other things for her to be like when she grows up.
For now, all I can say is, "Forties, here I come!"
I definitely don't feel like I am over the hill. My life is not exactly where I thought I'd be when I turned 40. I think mostly because I got married a little later and had my babies in my mid-to-late thirties (who'd have thought that I'd be nursing a 6 month old on my 40th birthday?) that I still feel young and even somewhat inexperienced. 40 just doesn't seem as old as I'd once thought it was. It also helps that I have great friends who turn 40 with me!
Way ahead of time, I told my husband that what I really wanted for my 40th birthday was time all by myself. That may seem kind of wierd to people, because usually people don't want to be alone on their birthday. But with my lifestyle right now I never get time to myself, and it is the one thing I crave. I am naturally a contemplative person, and more introverted as well. Staying home full-time with 3 young children leaves little room for solitude, meditation, journaling...the things I have relied on in the past upon for soul care.
Thankfully my actual birthday landed on a Saturday. My wonderful husband gave me the gift of time off and time alone. He took care of the kids for 6 hours while I did my own thing. I got a pedicure and ate a quick lunch, then headed out to the park for the rest of the afternoon. The weather was perfect, and I found a great spot on a little hill to lay out my mat & relax. Even though I brought a couple of books and my journal, I truly had no agenda. I read. I closed my eyes when I felt like it. I just stared out into space, totally alone with my own thoughts. I journaled. Most of all, I didn't have to do anything for anyone else! (this sounds so selfish, doesn't it?) It was a wonderful birthday gift. It was so refreshing and re-energizing. Mostly I was able to reflect on where God has brought me to at this point and how I am so grateful and thankful for His grace & love.
Good thing, because the very next day, I ran a half-marathon! This was a goal I'd set for myself awhile back. I had planned to do this race last year in May, but ended up becoming pregnant with our third child, so I secretly hoped I could do it this year instead. Being 6 months post-partum was enough time to train for it, and my husband is crazy enough to encourage me to do it (& run with me!). It was not a brilliant finish on my part, but I still feel so lucky that I can run, and it was good motivation to keep working out and get back into shape again. And extra blessing was getting to train with my good friend & neighbor, as well as with my dad & husband.
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| All smiles before the race... |
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| We made it! |
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| Curly again! |
For now, all I can say is, "Forties, here I come!"
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